Upheld While Growing in the Dark

 

Have you ever been in a place where you just plain LOST it? A place where you went to God screaming, crying and kicking as you demanded to know what He was doing? Did you ever wonder if just maybe He miscalculated what you could handle?

Recently, I came across a picture in a magazine that showed a young lady sitting in the cleft of a tree gazing up at the night sky. The way the branches were drawn made it look almost like the palm of a hand. The stars were everywhere and the moon was a bright light. It brought back a memory.

Some years ago, I jumped into my car when I was overwhelmed and headed to a dark lonely spot where I let go. I yelled at God, screamed, cried, sobbed and demanded that He tell me what He thought He was doing and how much longer He was going to do it. I wanted out.

I don’t know how long I was there. But it must have taken quite some time for me to vent my rage. When the emotional whirlwind finally settled and I was quiet, I gazed up at the sky.  It was a very dark night probably because I was in a place where there were no artificial lights close by and I could truly see the panorama above me.

I sat gazing from one horizon to the other over and over. Stars everywhere. Suddenly a feeling of well-being came out of that darkness.

Do you think I don’t see you?

The stars assured me that He did. He saw me. He listened to the anguish. He heard the cries.

You are in the palm of my hand. I will never leave you. Nor will I let you go. Those who are mine cannot be snatched out of my hand.

I was in the palm of His hand. As His fingers closed over me, the dark set in. This is where He was forming my character—teaching me how to be courageous, how to trust Him enough to obey Him to the very end. Because at the end, He is my reward.

Character living can only be learned in the dark. But if we trust Him, He will hold us safely through it all. He is, after all, the Creator of those stars above. How can I doubt that He sees me?

“My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me. And I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; neither shall anyone snatch them out of My hand. My Father, who has given them to Me, is greater than all; and no one is able to snatch them out of My Father’s hand. I and My Father are One” John 10:27-30.